Books: Your Brain is Your Sexiest Organ - a SHAG Mini-Workshop

Originally Aired: September 22, 2022

Hosted by Carolyn
Watch on IG @weloveshag
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My name is Carolyn.

If you have any questions about this workshop content, please message us or come visit us in Williamsburg, Brooklyn. We will be walking you through some of the books we have here, and also the ways in which reading can really amplify your pleasure and help you have a very fulfilling life.

There are so many ways to learn and absorb these days. We understand not everyone is a reader, but books are a great choice for many people, including those who are more visually inclined, who just like to read, who are ultimate nerds like me, who are very curious, or who are interested in self growth. We will start with an overview of brain anatomy  -

source: sciencenotes.org

- as it relates to experience and pleasure, and then we will look at the types of books you could engage with when it comes to sexuality and pleasure. This workshop will cover everything from self-help workbooks to academic texts and everything in between. I’ll be recommending books that are creative, colorful, and playful, and which can help you get more into your body and understand a little bit more about who you are as a sexual being.

Why read, as it relates to pleasure? This is something I feel very strongly about in terms of my own journey and my own growth. There's so much that you can explore “passively” – and I’m using quotes here because reading is, of course, an active activity. When I say “passive,” I mean that you can do it on your own, without a partner.

But you can also read with your partner/s

It's not something where you are necessarily out and about, experiencing something, learning experientially. There's a lot of information you can familiarize yourself with or get excited by before putting anything into practice out in the world with others. That includes techniques for pleasure, toys, relationship styles, your identity, and more. I think it can be really helpful to get a lay of the land before you're putting things into practice. Knowledge is power, and information about yourself can be really empowering.

I think it can be important to learn about yourself, your interests, and your boundaries before engaging with others, especially for certain topics, like if you're engaging with BDSM, kink, polyamory, or really any similar topics that requires a high level of thought and understanding about yourself, preferably before you're engaging with someone else. In that way, I think it's best practice to do your homework. So, that's what we're going to go into today: some ways that you can do your homework, because homework is hot!

Let’s begin with our focus on the brain, because it really is your sexiest organ. People think of their genitalia or other body parts with sensory nerves as being the sexiest organs, but I think everything is mental. Everything comes from the brain. Evidence from studies, time and time again, has shown that there are four main components in the brain when it comes to pleasure, a step-by-step process towards arousal. This is true regardless of gender or sex. It's consistent across the board for all humans. I'm going to just briefly go through the four steps. First, when you're moving through life, you are constantly recognizing and grading sexy stimuli. Although you may not think of it in nerdy terms like that, what you are literally doing is walking around both subconsciously and consciously clocking everything you experience and determining whether or not it's sexually arousing, and grading the level of arousal. That's all happening in the prefrontal cortex.

Next, there's emotional content evaluation, which also happens in the prefrontal cortex, as well as the amygdala. Then, for the third brain component to pleasure, if enough stimulation is provided in the second component, you may be motivated to the phase of sexual arousal in the brain. There are actually four different parts of the brain that are key to activating the arousal process, including the hypothalamus, which is a big one! Lastly, there's the physiological state of being aroused as a result. You may recognize that one as “arousal,” but it is really the last of these four pieces. It's like your brain is preparing the body for sex. That might mean your heart is racing, your blood pressure is soaring, you have genital responses, or you experience hormonal changes. 

All of these physiological events are happening in that fourth state of pleasure in the brain. Then, if you reach orgasm -

- which, let’s note, is not always the goal! - brain scans show that all regions across the brain light up like a Christmas tree.

The two parts of the brain that actually help with the process of arousal, the amygdala and the prefrontal cortex, are the two components of the brain that actually shut down during orgasm. The scientific community has basically concluded from that information that in order to reach that climactic state, we have to be robbed of cognition and functioning, allowing us an embodied experience. You may have experienced in your life, or heard others talk about, orgasm brain. During or after orgasm, it’s common to feel a foggy feeling in the brain, not be super verbal, or have cognitive functioning go somewhat offline.

That's what's actually happening biologically, which I think is pretty cool. The chemicals also that are released are a mashup of oxytocin, prolactin, and endorphins that help you feel happy, content, relaxed, and connected, whether to yourself or to others.

Stay tuned for Part 2!

**This text was transcribed from SHAG’s live Mini-Workshop on September 22, 2022 and edited for clarity. This opinion piece is not intended to constitute licensed expert advice; all content is for general informational purposes only.**